i need a penis for penetration, you wont do.
oh yeah... my b.
I kind of wish I was already fat. So I could eat all I want and not worry about getting fat. Cause I'd already be at that point.
fuck your aforementioned shoe
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
I've thrown up so many times in the third floor bathroom of Baldwin that they should probably just go ahead and name it after me.
I've come to realize time passes slowest when I'm sitting in class, waiting for microwavable foods, working out, & giving head.
She was perfectly content just sitting in the middle of everyone blowing bubbles in the air.
i just ran into my boss at the liquor store. we didnt exchange words, just nodded in mutual understanding.
He puked over my shoulder into the toilet. The guy in the next stall sounded totally appalled.
I just remembered that last night I ate nachos off of someone else's table with a stranger
I imagine my service panda will provide sufficient protection. At the very least it will be an irresistible cuddly distraction while I make good my escape.
I really have to stop going to the movies high. Spending $10 to not know what the fuck is going on is starting to get pricey.
So I paid Bumble $10 to see who liked my profile for a month. Cheap, easy dick. It's all about the economics, yo.
Can't find my wig, my underwear, or my dignity. Halloween 2016
I did just chug a pint glass of wine during a solid round of masterbation, so I believe I am ready for bingo.
Randomize