I attract so much trash. The guy that is engaged and kissed me is here so is his fiancé. I feel likeshw knows and will cut me in the bathroom might happen. If I'm not at the pool tomorrow she has blonde hair and is really flat.
One of her kids, Dakota I think, got stuck in a ceiling fan and she had a fit, thats when she found the penis hat.
My RA just tried to write me up for having sex too loudly during quiet hours.
i just fucked the bartender on my cruise to get free alcohol. have things gone too far?
Listening to Joy Division and applying for Walmart. You get to choose which one is more depressing.
His car is carseat is compatible. I checked while we were banging in the back seat...
His phone pocket dialed me while he was crapping. He was quietly singing stayin alive and possibly passing his intestines.
he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...
Wow. Last night.
I knew you were shit blasted when you called me your "sunflower queen"
Summers almost over and we haven't golfed, got naked or had sex yet. Let's do all three in one day, no particular order.
He used pronouns for his penis while sexting. I don't know what I did to deserve this.
I explained to him that me turning straight is a once a year thing. And this boy just happens to be the chosen one.
And remember people can't hear you kick ass in space
skipped tacos for a blowjob. No tacos. No blowjob. More importantly...no tacos. Wtf?
At least they took the pillow of my bed before they had sex. My friends are so polite.
Randomize