i've counted 4 condom wrappers but only 3 condoms. not again.
told my boyfriend i was a virgin so he wouldnt feel bad since he is. now hes asking why his dick is so itchy. should i tell him why?
i don't see why you should, it's not like you told the other guys with the itchy dicks.
Damn it if I pass out in the bathroom one more time this month im going to rehab...
That's because you're a slut. A slut fucking a fence.
Also: how drunk is your brother? He just left me a message as batman.
sooo I am sorta kinda using your name as my stripper stage name.
All I'm asking for is flower occasionally, and in return you get to come home to me naked in heels. Is that to much to ask for?
Just saw a huge group of people walk by in there in their underwear. Too stoned for this.
Today's forecast is horny with strong chance of booty calls. Low of Craigslist cruising, and a high of climaxing in a stranger's bed.
Seriously how many times do I have to sleep with him before he stops calling me dude
Do I not have a Brazilian bc of my boyfriend situation or do I not have a boyfriend bc of my brazilian situation?
I woke up sick this morning, maybe sucking a random dudes finger at a bar last night wasn't that clean of an idea.....
I said no to friends with benefits because it was too much commitment
Is it weird that the girl I'm fucking just wished me luck on my date tonight?
I'm SO high. And there is so much pudding in this car
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