garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
i feel like even strangers are annoyed with me because of how drunk i was last night
I love seeing the creepers that friend request me outside of facebook. its like seeing a unicorn in the middle of campus.
Just set a new record on Need For Speed at the arcade. Had to enter Tiger Woods as the name.
airport. 106 proof japanese liquor. 4 little travel size containers. im proud to be smarter than the average american.
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
Congratulations, you fucked a nickle into me.
I mean looking back on it, it's unlucky but at least now we can say we were in jail from 2011 to 2012
That's thinking positively..
I hope your pay increase has gone through because I might need bail. This is not what I dreamed adulthood would be like.
Yeah, first time I've shit my pants in my twenties... I'm thinking about putting it on my Facebook timeline
Whatever it's Canadian jail, it's not like Guatemala or something. It'll be nice and cushy and they'll probably throw him a big bday party with all his friends and strippers
When you get home...find me in the shower. Only safe place at the moment.
Dad's teaching me to make moonshine this weekend as "college prep". How scared should I be sis?
We could put on there: "Drink jager bombs and do stupid shit faster, with more energy!"
he kept insisting he didn't have my number, so i called his phone and my number came up as "yeaaaaaaaaah!"
Randomize
