if i hurry i can finally have sex while stoned off my ass
godspeed.
i have more money on itunes than i do in my bank account... college.
You said you didn't deserve to walk so you started crawling down to your room
My sheets, bed, and bathroom are covered in blood. She needed 14 stitches after a trip to ER. This is the last white girl I ever hookup with.
I got mine. It's a truly beautiful penis. Plus he pulled his tongue muscle on my vagina.
at the hospital. the stripper fell on his face when she was trying to grab the dollar bill out of his mouth with her ass. broken nose for sure.
Well I almost walked away with an Irish guy's boarding pass and some south guy's dignity
I say we go and bring jello shots with laxatives. 57% sure one of his toilets is broken
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
It's almost like a boob-text, but it's not. Because it was live. And you were showing a bunch of people.
You fucked him. I baby bird fed him whiskey . I feel like we've bonded.
I just face planted on a condom wrapper in my bed...thought of you.
You're so romantic.
Woke up pants less in the vacant apartment across the hall. It was unlocked because they were showing it to someone. When they walked in I woke up and said "this is a great place to live" and walked out
I think our maternal nature is best focused on grown ass men and cats.
I am certain that you would be a mere freckle on the behemoth of slutty that has taken place at this complex.
Randomize