I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically
god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
my boobs are a 3G dead zone. as soon as i take my phone out of my bra, it has a signal again.
hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
Is it bad that now when i read ingredients in the food I eat i only read it as shrooms instead of mushrooms ?
promise me that when we are 32, we will look nothing like Kim Zolciak. Promise me right this instant.
im calling her cock vulture from now on
I just tried to text you by typing "whoa" into my contacts.
obviously he wasnt ready for this jelly and you can quote me on that
Just paid off my possession ticket on 4/20. Helloooo awesome.
I don't know when it is this year, but if I ever text you an illegible text that also happens to contain sharks, Shark Week started.
You fell asleep mid blowjob with my vibrator in your HAND. So no, I will not bring you pizza.
I'm gonna chug this bud light an might injure this high school penis, like I'm 17 again
She tried to fuck me right at the bar in front of everyone. She actually got my pants unzipped before I realized what was going on.
Ahaah! I just stole batteries from work for my vibrator. I am that person.
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