im six kinds of drunk right now
i think you know its gunna be a bad day when it starts with throwing up into a red plastic cup
They had an entire room dedicated to passed out people. It was like a dogpile of cross faded toddlers drooling on each other.
i threw up on the table at the pizza place and peed in her room mates closet. i wouldnt invite me back either
Using the ceiling fan to slice the hotdogs in mid-air can only be contributed to our liberal use of 1800.
This weekend was suppose to be a 'smoke weed and stare at things' weekend. Not a 'spend all my rent money partying with Europeans till 8 am' weekend
Yeah but those French chicks did get naked
Depending upon how the Sox game progresses, I'll either cry on the bar or fuck someone tonight...
I just texted him and asked him to keep some in case I need help sealing the deal.
Girl Scout cookies are like roofies for fat chicks.
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
We can't tell anyone we fucked because I'm still trying to get with your friend. Is she coming next weekend?
if drunk means calling me and asking to borrow the game of life at 2am then I think you were drunk
There's still helium in the tank I found in the garbage outside the bar!
I hooked up with a guy that had a beard last night felt like I was building a fucken log cabin
Yeah we invited her back for chicken nugget sandwiches
Not only did I sleep with the guy but I think I may have called my work and quit to go work for him.
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