im letting my talent of no gag reflex go to waste
i get of class at 4. it takes me 17 minutes to walk home and 3 to load a bowl. thank you, priority registration.
We made out for three hours. Then she said she didn't sleep with redheads and left the party. So yes, I'm still drinking.
I never thought that it would get to the point where I would have to specify that by "hang out" I meant "fuck like rabbits." Growing up shouldn't be this way.
it's like my freshman wet dream come true
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
Im pretty sure that girl just said "Im taking you home even if your girlfriend has to come too." Why are we here again?
Second time this week margarita night turned homoerotic
the last thing I heard was you screaming as the rodeo team herded you to the next party
I was told I sang Taylor Swift's entire discography in between violent bursts of green vomit before falling asleep in the bath tub
My suggestion is that you just get high and set shit on fire
You know how I said I hit my head so hard I saw two of him and tried to make out with both? Well, it turns out he has a twin.
It's going to be like a slumber party but with ketamine
Thanks for DJing my sex last night. You were on point 💜
I thought i was doing pretty well but I walked into my first class and everyone on my side of the room immediately asked how drunk and high I was
Randomize
