Everytime she opens her mouth it's like a fucking terrorist attack on my life.
Hannah wants to know if she cant borrow your stats notes because she threw up on hers.
Just did ten shots in 8.34 minutes........ Slowly getting over the loss
I'm sorry the first time we hungout you had to witness me throw up in the ocean then army crawl to shore.
When you can pee with one hand accurately while texting, you drink too much.
Couldn't find my swimsuit top anywhere this morning but finally found it in the skimmer of the pool so thats how my night apparently went
I lost all of my bathing suit tops.. This is both a success and a failure
i was so unappreciative the bar was giving out sweatbands UNTIL I casually used it during sex.
As I was about to fuck him, he requested a moment of silence for Leonard Nimoy.
I just want a relatively mentally stable guy with tattoos and facial hair that loves Captain America as much as I do and will fuck me the way I deserve to be fucked, is that too much to ask for?
If we're going to communicate going forward, you'll need to be versed in Gillian Anderson.
I'm pretty sure I naked in my first year of college more than I was as a baby.
I'm sorry, but the bed has won this battle. I got up, changed my shirt, combed my hair, put on some deodorant, and then looked at my bed and got back in
you asked if you could borrow my vagina for the night
Gonna do a few lines then clean my room so I can feel like my life is somewhat in order.
Randomize
