sometimes when you bring the thunder you get lost in the storm
i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
Just found my girlfriend's stash of animated Japanese porn
And to think, I actually considered breaking up with her
dude I just sharted for the first time ever, kind of gross
well what did you think, shitting your pants would be fun
I threw up so much beer last night that my puke had a nice head on it.
my 12 year old sister just told me how admirable it was that i felt comfortable going out with my friends dressed "like that"
my Prof for my bio lab has his lab coat collar popped. it's 8 am and im too hungover for this guy
I knew his night was already over when he started marking lines on the bottle and setting goals
Call me next time you want to get irresponsibly drunk when we have grown up things to do the next day.
She sat on the stairs and yelled sex positions at us. I don't remember if we went along with it but judging by the beer and condoms I'm thinking yes.
I hate that he uses me for something other than sex. What does he think I am? His girlfriend? Ha.
If I were you I'd use my green card to do more coke and less talking
Oh dude I know. When something that's supposed stop pregnancies taste like chocolate something's up
Let's try finding a bar where there aren't people who want to hang me from a tree by my nutsack
I GOT THE PAPER IN AT 11:58
EAT MY ENTIRE ASS COM 101
Randomize