So I'm at the Chevron by your house. I need a condom and a couch.
Together?
Preferably.
It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
90% of the problems in your life are directly related to your vagina
The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
Oh my god. I think I just sexted my mom...
What?!
Fwd: Ride me, you sleek sleek woman!!!
I just past a guy who was biking and double fisting wit glass beer bottles. That is what i call talent
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
i wasn't going to tell her about the threesome but i had to explain the tree and the green paint everywhere
HE IS COURTING ME WITH CHINESE FOOD AND IT IS WORKING.
I think, at this point, getting pissed and declaring my love via reality TV would be an improvement
I'm missing a sock, a boot, and antlers. We need to get on that.
Hooked up to multiple episodes of Even Stevens last night. What the fuck.
I got about 15 snapchats from you with your hand saying "you want cheese sticks" or something like that and one of some weird looking weed
My mom just came upstairs handed me an Adderall and asked if I could help her wash the ceilings
The internet was right. Snorting muscle relaxers is awful
Randomize
