i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
Do you think he likes his girlfriend's moustache?
under NO circumstances is it acceptable to fist pump to taylor swift
Who was that couple sleeping in your bed with us last night?
we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
I woke him up and he was mumbling something about it being moist, or he peed himself but it was okay.
The calves of my jeans are covered in jello shots from Sunday, how desperate do I have to be before I start licking them?
The assistant vp has a bottle of wine on his desk & I have a feeling my boobs will be making an appearance today.
Based on the fact my iPad is covered in pizza, I'm going to assume I ate pizza last night
I found one of your hair extensions on the dance floor. You put it back in your hair
I ate a hotdog off the ground last night.
It's volleyball. Just do it. You want to look sporty. Save sexy librarian for another day.
I give out orgasms like candy and ride a motorcycle...how is that not appealing
I stole the butter cup cuz i brought home my rolls and chicken and didnt want the butter everywhere. I miss your body because its amazing.
The good thing about country bars is that the men generally look like men. The bad thing is the country music.
Randomize
