Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
Who goes to Church hungover
Those who weren't lucky enough to go still drunk
I sware she could use her own nose as a dildo.
so what if he's got a new girlfriend. the guy i'm fucking has an english accent. i win.
You just kept taking about baking cornbread and doing your physics. Even drunk assed random you is a better student than me.
Nope we're in the ER. He lit himself on fire trying to impress another girl with magic tricks.
I'd rate him "doable" on a scale from "ew, run" to "you should've already fucked him".
That's about an "8" on normal scales.
we're going to drop off one of our cars at the police station tonight so we'll be able to drive home in the morning
Don't think anyone else in the building has a lunchbox full of yay
Hey there's a sandwich in there too!
I'm not sure if it was the 11 shots or your naturally vibrant personality but I recall you being quite noisy that evening
The rest of the concert I just stared at the lights and didn't really listen to the music cuz I was trying to make sure my brain still worked cuz my face was numb and I couldn't move... Yeah I'm not a weed brownie person
We're following a guy carrying a door for beer pong at his place..join us when you are deemed sober enough to leave the hospital.
I think it's gonna be hard to find a guy that won't take my consistent drinking as alcoholism
They were arguing about who would hit the piñata first so naturally you tore it open with your hands. You broke the piñata and their hearts.
He stopped mid sex to pour wine in my mouth...
Marry him.
Randomize