It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
No clues in my phone. Only dialed call: my own social security number. And that was before 10:00pm.
Yeah kinda weird. My grandparents are here for dinner and I'm chilling on the couch close to tripping out on pain killers. My pap asked me how works going and I prettymuch drooled on myself as an answer.
Basically taped my dick down because it's too obvious in this costume...
it's the amount of time you spend on preventing me from puking that really cements this friendship
You kidnapped her dog. I don't care that you and the dog are epic bros, that's just not cool. Return him.
HELP! I GOT DRUNK IN THE LIVING ROOM AND CANT GET UP UPSTAIRS
He didn't have much of a personality. But I had like 100 orgasms, so that's cool.
My hand smells like rave and peanut butter.
I appreciate your acceptance of my lack of morals
Why are my jeans soaking wet and smell like chlorine??
Bc u told a stranger in the hotel "I have sinned' and made him get into the hotel fountain and "baptize u". I've got a vid
Woke up in the hospital naked with my id's taped to my chest. Also apparently puked on two guys, two girls and an escalade (at the same time). Good night.
The prescription the hospital gave me for pain and nausea doubles for my hangovers... Maybe I'll hit up the ER more often
So my ex just asked for my address to send me his wedding invitation... in Europe. Awesome.
That’s basically a green light to fuck his dad
My nipples are raw, I've yet to go to bed, I feel like death, and I'm at work. Thank you jack, crown, and Lafayette!
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