Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
you were crying and the really sympathetic homeless man offered you a sip of his whiskey. who was i to stop you?
Omg my grandpa just told me he wants to die in his 90's shot by a jealous husband
the girl next to me in class just threw up in a waterbottle during our exam.
I smoked weed with pregnant girl. I'm going to hell.
I can hear the condescending tone from the atm when it asks if $3 is all I would like to deposit
we found his I.D. in the upstairs bathroom...under a towel in a hidden pile of snacks from her kitchen
This girl has a mullet weave. I missed oakland.
She just told me she thinks she bruised her labia in class
I think Jabba the Hut is dying in the stall next to me.
holy shit the woman im hooking up with is closer to my moms age than my own
I'm still, like... really stoked about not having any STDs
If I was banging all the guys that people think I am, I'd quit buying batteries.
No. I'm sorry but once your "would go gay for" list exceeds five people, you're bi. Get over it.
chicken nuggets make me a bit homicidal
Randomize
