But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
saw my dad's penis on the x-ray last night. at least his hip wasn't broken
For a second, I wondered if I could smoke pizza.
We have to talk through the words with friends chat so his gf won't find out
Drunk tip #47: Its better to overestimate how many plastic bottles itll take to urinate in, rather then underestimate.
Watching tv. She's giving me head and she hates it when I watch her.
All I remember from last night is petting the broom with my feet and feeling like I was standing on a horses head
We tried. It's impossible to cum while bouncing on a trampoline. It's like trying to sneeze while keeping your eyes open.
im breathing rainbows and everyone is talking in bubbles whatever you gave me give me more
There's a guy in here whose face looks like it would be perfect between my legs.
Might be using my graduation money to pay for an abortion.
I ate mushroom chocolates & went to the botanical gardens for Christmas. HAPPY FUCKING HOLIDAYS
He propositioned me for a threesome once so yeah I'd say he has what it takes to run for public office
ah lol cocaine is strange when I dose I feel like an elephant running through a grocery store
hes sooooo boring!!! I feel like I’m in a relationship with myself now. I have an 8 inch dildo under my bed, THATS how much I’m in a relationship with myself.
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