how could I be having a bad time, I have the three most important things in life: Goat cheese, Xanax, and Saved By the Bell Re-runs.
And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
next time the cops show up in riot gear we should probably leave
and miss being on the news....no way
you kept saying 'can i put my penis on the grill?' and it was all i could do to stop you. you're welcome, though
Most eventful shower ever. Jacked off, peed and puked in there.
When it gets to the point that I'm more comfortable being naked at his house than my own, it's time to readdress the fuckbuddyship.
nope im down the street in my car watching the front of her house. its actually less creepy than it sounds
Smoked Hookah in the playhouse last night. Childhood was so fun.
I found out his moms name, maiden name, profession, and office location, his dads name and profession, his home phone, picture of their house, all of his work profiles, and the cost of their house. All I'm trying to do is find his damn twitter
Why can't I come over and snuggle you and make you lick my boots
I have a 30 minute video visit blind date tonight with a guy in prison. And it's costing me $9. ROCK... BOTTOM...
I solemnly swear to help bail you out of jail when you throw a dildo at a politician.
I'm glad you found someone that both loves you and is cool doing coke off your tits. Proud of you.
New goal find someone I love enough to use these Japanese pancake flavored condoms on
So what your saying is you dont remember trying to hit a golf ball off my chest with a 9 iron?
Randomize
