Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
New record: 45 minutes. Afterwards I played We Are The Champions while we cuddled.
you were on all fours yelling at the earth to stop spinning.
She introduced herself and then asked "have you ever fucked a girl with a cast?"
shes 19, drunk and said she has no gag reflex. im trying to decide if i have scruples
you dont
i dont
my dad just asked me if my booty call guy that comes over at 3am and leaves at 6 would like to stay for sunday brunch next week. you in?
I don't even want to think about the kind of person who would shit in the street before 10pm on a Sunday.
Idk we were snorting lines and making out in the stall while these people were cheering us on, on the other side. And that's when I realized he wasn't the only guy in the girls bathroom.
Dude, just be careful. Her invitation for BJ is just a trap for her to stick her finger up your ass.
hot boxing the bathroom at chili's. where the fuck are you, it's too big of a box for just one person.
Dude, he's legal now. You could not pry me from his dick with the jaws of life.
So this 40 year old woman was trying to bring me into the bathroom to blow me and the bartender called the cops on her because she was showing her tits. Only in asbury.
want me to make you a grilled cheese? I can't guarantee it'll be as good as yours but i'll go down on you afterwards if you want
brb printing out this text and putting it on my bedroom wall
Apparently I pulled that girl's number while I was trying to insist my drivers license had enough money on it to cover the tab.
I told my boyfriend that the thing I missed most about him was scratching his balls for him.
Randomize