i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
she was puking into the toilet drowning herself saying "its okay im a swimmer"
I can't believe you're fucking in the bar bathroom, but everyone else can, and they're really proud.
French people screaming and throwing stuff out the window. We told the manager and he's pissed and going up there. This is gonna be like cops. Maybe better than cops.
He just turned 21, it's very obvious the end of their relationship is near. Now we play the waiting game.
We ate a mysterious delivered pizza which no one ordered and then the wii wouldn't work so 20 of us watched porn on two laptops. Drunk took the awkward away.
If you listen closely you can hear the sound of inbreeding and shame.
I ordered a VEGAN pizza, because it gets here the fastest, just so I could get a 2 litre of Coke. For my whiskey.
In that case, if you come anywhere near my house you can expect to be chased down various streets by a half naked me wielding a baseball bat. No, I am not giving you my address.
Why so serious bruh
we both turned hook ups into relationships we are crushing this thing called life right now.
how do you always get into these "we banged the same dude now lets be friends" situations???
So I definitely tried to pay a cab with baseball tickets last night
He signed my ass with a Waffle House pen.
she's my really slutty friend i bring around so i can act slutty and not feel as bad about it
We’ve discussed sex and dinner. Like chicken nuggets while doing it doggie and watching tv.
Randomize
