I'll forget this but out at 4am with a lesbian model at lil waynes bday party for the record
And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
Listen, I'm 30. If it doesnt involve a super soaker and some chicken wings, you can count me out.
there are seriously like six guinea pigs in my bathtub right now
NBC reported that a group almost has enough signatures to submit pole dancing as an Olympic sport in 2016...
God I fucking love America.
She was kinda tragic... like a puppy that runs into things. Cute but really stupid. So, yeah, I hit it.
At our floor meeting the RA was talking about bathroom hygiene and I really wanted to be like "what about shower sex."
Valid question
I just wanna say I did some math and I lasted 1,052,000 more minutes than you at the bar before I got kicked out. That's 729 days. Bitch
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
He's hitting it raw. Might as well stick his dick in a vat of SARS at this point.
Where was Alyssa when you were sniffing the bouncer?
Passed out on some guy who looked like someone from Duck Dynasty.
I don't question myself. That's what I have you for.
I'm honored.
I'm setting goals and achieving them. I'd say I'm quite mature for my age.
You're goal was to fuck him and you don't even remember it.
I’m going to cut back. New Year, New Me
I would never wish less dick on anyone but do what you gotta do
You wouldn't eat with utensils. You insisted on making your own spoon out of a bendy straw and staples while singing "I'm a survivor" by Destiny's Child.
Randomize
