But guess what. I'm gonna roll over and go to sleep cuz there's no cuddling in phone sex.
you know its bad when everytime i put on a shirt i think of who i hooked up with in it
I'm okay.. I had a good heart to heart with the cab driver Raheem - it's going to be our year.
Oh yeah forgot to mention that I referred to myself as the oral sex heavyweight champion last night
I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
That's exactly how my pussy feels when I shave it. Like a cross between a naked mole rat and a newborn child. Embrace it.
In other news it turns out I like Heineken.. In a desert island kind of way
So last night I turned down multiple drinks because "I didn't want to hold them". It's time reevaluate my decisions
Please tell me I made it home with both shoes on
Nope
You were drunk at 5 You went to the dining hall and cried because your brain and fingers weren't working. Your RA came up to you and suddenly you became sober. I was very proud of you.
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
she's throwing knives it scares me
update: broke ceiling. glass everywhere
My vagina is very pro this idea
Its that time in the evening when I've had a few cocktails and wish you'd make a video about the packers and Jack Daniels.
I just licked honey off my own tit. Is there anything about that which doesn't SCREAM single???
Randomize
