I just used my 2 drink stirrers as chopsticks to get a lime out of my drink. I really am Asian.
here I sit at Southern Illinois' finest pubs and I thought I heard your laugh. I was sadly astonished to turn and find a midget cracking herself up reading the label on her can of chewing tobacco...
He told me he looked up all the foods that make cum taste better and he put it all on his moms shopping list. she came through my line. this ones a keeper I think.
what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
i am too hungover to go to class can you just call me and put it on speaker phone
Its name is Richard. And I think he formally introduced us.
The amount I want to die right now is not proportionate to the level of fun I had last night. Not fair.
They let me close the tennis center alone. It's a 6-minute drive from 2 of my booty calls. Scratch tennis court bj off the bucket list.
Welcome to the south, dude. Gives the phrase "I wish you a dry ass" a new perspective.
Literally just inhaled three cinnamon rolls. Sara is staring. It was inhuman
He's 5'2" and his dick 4'8"
Of course, it's a law of friendship. "Thy friend Shalt always hold hatred for thine friend's swinish ex"
You don't come back from leaving a bag of shit on someone's counter Jill
My sex life is driven by spite and alcohol
she was sitting on the toilet asking for me to take a "cute facebook profile picture" for her
Randomize
