Whiskey dick.
Yea dude! Love it. Hate it. Have it.
Everyday of my life.
Going to get tested monday. You're coming with. Bonding time, slut style.
Less talking, more tequila
cheese fries, coffee, with a side of dry heaving in the bathroom at the diner on campus at 5am. never felt better.
I know it I should, but it's kinda nice. It's smells like unbridled enthusiasm and copious amounts of melt your face off sex.
We always end up having sex in random places after class. I need to stop letting this dude borrow my pens.
Hey sorry for being annoying last night, I just realized how many times I yelled "JORDAN!" during and after playing pong.
Driving home this morning in my minion costume makes me rethink the 0 tint on my windows.
Do you ever just feel like you can feel hormones radiating from your uterus?
Dude, you need better judgement.Trust me I know. I put my dick in the wrong mouths all the time
my roommate woke me up with head. more awkward than it sounds.
He was licking my ear while recommending that I shop at IKEA. I think he's my perfect guy.
I'm glad you got documented proof of my stupidity with a head full of nitrous
Hahaha and I'm glad you are doing whip its at a childrens basketball game
There is eyeliner on my toilet. Vodka and I have a love hate relationship.
I couldn't be more proud to be a cougar. Just wondering how these twenty somethings learned how to fuck so well? Must be porn.
Randomize
