wtf
I'm guessing you saw the bathroom?
i kept telling her phones are not food, and she countinued to put it in her mouth..
You should make it a point to use vocabulary that is competition appropriate around him, like "champion" and "training" and "victory sex"
Just don't let me fall on anything that can be broken. Unless its a dick
At some point tonight the bad ideas in my head became bad decisions that happened outside my head
One my way home. There was too much fog, strobe lights, and cocaine for my taste.
They're not that bad of drunks, they come back to the vehicle with more stuff than they went in with, so its a profitable venture.
Ok more importantly someone in a chicken costume just stepped in front of my car and started breakdancing...
She is sending me pics of her sex faces...which totally counts as sexting in my book
In between rounds of sex, you stopped and did drunken handstand push-ups.
It was right before we played jenga with champagne glasses for a good half hour
If there was a tv show called "True Life: My 58 Year Old Dad Rolls Better J's Than Me" I'd be on it.
I just woke up in my locked bathroom. It's 5 PM. What happened?
Adderal can only make me focus so much. Your ass is stronger than my medicine. Congratulations.
Well, the night started out with you ALMOST falling out of a tree. Then we went back to the tree after about 9 shots and you DID fall out of the tree.
Randomize
