Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
they almost convinced me to put "Funbags" in the 'other names you may be known as' section of the job application
he told me he once ran a blackmarket liquor store out of his house. thats all it took for me to go home with him
Just saw the hottest 4 garbage men ever. They should make a calendar
after eating me out, he asked for something to drink. i gave him a glass of water and he said he needed something stronger.
When I sent you a text telling you to splash water on your face, you texted me back with 'Iwehre N qyull.'
I miss you more than I would miss junk food if I went on a diet. And you've seen me eat, you know how desperate I'd be.
Also yeah I would definitely have to say that one of my favorite things to do is to get high and pet cats.
I gather from Facebook you got drunk last night and took semi naked pictures of yourself?
No fucking judgements. You know me. Chinese food vent sessions are safe places.
As he was going down on me, I looked over his shoulder and said "ohh a Christian mingle commercial is on"
BRING THE BAGELS
My date ended with her leaving the bar with that guy who used to jerk off in the back of the school bus.
Rich men love me! I remind them of their trophy wife!!!
Are we allowed to ho on the roof?
Randomize
