I just wanted to draw pictures of limp wieners on peoples doors and smash pictures of palm trees. That's it.
He kept asking me to take off my bra and I sat up so he could. He fumbled with it for a few minutes and when I sighed and went to undo it he goes, "Yeah, you got this."
How do you get a cum stain out of a trampoline?
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
im sitting in my room wearing my power rangers shirt watching a movie about a magical dragon. Ive totally forgotten what having a sex life is like.
why do the even put the "Please drink responsibly" on tequila ads? like has anything responsible ever come from tequlia. No. never.
Drunk lesbians having an argument about their realationship isn't as hot as I imagined.....
If u were an xman, what would ur power be? I would shoot lasers from my boobs.
I want him to be the Hulk to my Brooke Hogan this Halloween. Can I ask him to be my daddy this weekend?
Only if you say it like that.
She kept telling me to calm down. I was on the floor with my eyes shut, not moving. In levels of calm I was one step above coma patient
As his dick went in he shouted GOAL at the top of his voice.
My life is over. I farted in open court. Noticeably. The judge looked at me. It echoed.
I got my first tattoo & injured myself while having sex in a national monument. I say we consider this weekend siezed.
Is it okay to thank someone for the orgasms they gave you, even though they weren't with you?
Hey by the way did you notice my third nipple in my snapchat
Randomize
