I just delivered a ham and cheese to a strip club. you were right this job is not that bad
i don't even remember going to get food. i think i got gas too.
She cut off the top of a watermelon and is now eating it with a spoon. She's more than half done.
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
Aparently i was the only guy at her parents bbq throwing up in the pool so Im the asshole right...
This chic sharing the cab with me just started givin me head. I'll be an extra 5 minutes.
Oh aight, and i was just going to be content with drinking, beating off and watching ninja turtles
I'm pretty sure I said "this might be the last time I'm in here" but then I took his pants off so that's a mixed message
If I die tonight, I want you to have the rest of my nachos. And my porn collection.
I lost my bar virginty and made out with a dwarf. It was a good night
Hahaha more like walk of pride. You entered the lions den last night.
What's life without a pregnancy scare?
Okay. So did I kiss you last night? I know that I made out with someone. Or a few someones. But I'm pretty sure that I made out with you. Was that real life?
It was a fun night. I made out with the door guy at the gay bar but he didn't speak english
There was no door guy at the bar
Just found $31 in my desk drawer. In $1's. WTF happened last night?!
Randomize
