**i WaNt TO sLaP mY niECe wHO ThINks iT iS cUte tO WriTE LiKE tHiS**
Just watched 1 guy 1 jar with my mom. Awkwardville...
just scratched off #34 on my list of things to do before age 30 - drunk in a helicopter.
Next time i try to unbutton my R.A's shirt with my teeth, please stop me
No promises.
I couldn't remember if it was hamsters or Iraq that you hated. I'm so sorry.
i don't think my life will be extraordinarily more meaningful if i let him put his tongue in my butthole.
my parents are out trying to convince the local liquor stores to post "do not sell our daughter alcohol" flyers. i'm preping my defense now.
would it be subtle enough if I played birthday sex on repeat while I may or may not be stripping?
You said you couldnt get the condom on but "its the thought that counts"
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
All I know is that we apparently made a drink we named The Single Girl which is rum, vodka, grain alcohol, and sprite and rolled around in the backyard.
They drank shots out of my cleavage. Surprisingly, the one who did the best was a gay guy.
I've said it before and I'll say it again: your tits are a danger to gay men everywhere.
My life is over. I farted in open court. Noticeably. The judge looked at me. It echoed.
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
he accidentally put it in my ass, i liked it but didn't tell him that and "accidentally" took his weed.
Randomize
