I am wasted and people are fist pumping. This should not happen on the west coast.
she was throwing up and singing "I HAD a feeling that tonight was going to be a good good night." And yeah she was still in her dress.
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
After i black out, be a good friend and point me to the direction of a girl with daddy issues, any girl would do just fine
Its completely acceptable to go naked under my graduation gown right?
Some ppl might frown upon it but theyre prudes
You called a girl at 4:30am to tell her "your pussy is my top priority" while simultaneously Urban Spooning late night cafes.
When everyone ask you tomorrow go ahead and tell them I'm the girl that fell of safe ride and was all bloody.
I woke up in a tutu and topless. How was your night?
Ok so last thing I remember was hugging a cop while vomiting
Based on my body hair location, my ancestors had very cold hamstrings and very warm chests
have you ever seen all dogs go to heaven this is important
So I sent him a snap of me half naked holding a pie last night.
Got home and told boyfriend what happened. He was like "you made out with a guy you call Balls Deep?" and hi-fived me.
i said cake fell into my bra, you stood up and yelled "Im coming soldier", leaped acrossed the couch and started motorboating my boobs. i would have been cool with it if your mom didnt keep calling me the "lesbiainizer"
Well when we Get drunk it gets rowdy. We could always attempt self-control. But historically and statistically speaking, we fail at that.
Randomize
