You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
Why does lindsey know I was naked in the kitchen?
I am one bad relationship away from having 30 cats.
I always have to poop after I paint my nails. It never fails.
She washed her feet in the sink at white castle. I want this girl in my life.
After doing lines off my chest, she said, "do you even know how fast I could suck your cock right now?!!" and her friend said, "yea she totally could".
Wheres my "thanks for using birth control effectively and not contributing to the downfall of society" card.
See, it wasn't that I broke my nose having sex. Its that I forgot about the bedposts...
how are things with the new girl?
good, we have nothing in common but she likes being choked
I made a side by side comparison of her Facebook pic and the chick on the anti meth billboards. Plus a ven diagram showing mostly shared physical attributes. I sent u the PowerPoint. You were sufficiently warned.
Do not try to steal a picnic table from a park, all you will end up with are sore arms and broken dreams.
It's not "nice." It's the supermodel of dicks.
Woah don't start going all boyfriend on me now, you're here for one thing and one thing only and that's sex, hot shameless sex.
He asked if I could not say his name during sex cause he liked the girl in the apartment above me.
I'm gonna invite every single tinder date I've had to my birthday. Let them fight, battle Royale style. The winner gets to fuck me. \n\nBest. Birthday. Ever
Randomize
