K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
so high driving around just saw a woman in a pink shirt chillin riding a horse
so high at work that a 35 year old with his kids handed me visine and winked at me. you win with the horse though
she needs to learn to take compliments like she takes dicks.
i just saw someone i know on True Life. i need new friends.
you should give me head with plastic fangs in
We've been friends for six months, when do my benefits kick in?
He offered me a 30 pack if I don't bring her to the party. Am I a bad friend If I take his offer?
Apparently as I was doing the walk of shame home my dad's date was on her way to hers. hoes come in all ages these days
And leave it to John to ask the cabby to make a Porno in his cab
Our foot and a bit height difference is kinda fun, except she's so tiny that after we ate burritos it looked like she was pregnant. I had a confusing bonner.
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
I immediately regret the tequila decision.
Just so you know, I woke up with 2 oven mits in my bed and no clothes on.
I'll just say I told you so at your funeral
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
Randomize
