I was about to go down on her and her dong flopped out and hit me in the chin. This may have a Nam like post-traumatic-stress-disorder effect on me.
Are we still dressing up as garden gnomes for halloween?
No. I would like to get laid again before I graduate.
My dad just passed me a joint.. this is a turning point in my life.
So, sleeping with all of my Vicodin in my bra because I knew she'd be searching my room for drugs tonight. I'LL SHOW HER.
Passing out is my livers way of protecting my mind.
This is what happens when you live with someone you met on Grindr
margarita monday on the first day back? my gpa is telling me noo! but my heart is telling me goo! I am conflicted..
Just saw a drunk bitch in the west village peeing on a car. You are not alone.
He told me he deactivated his facebook because his girlfriend caught him wackin it to my profile picture.
10 points to you
And what in gods fuck were you drinking. It tasted like windex with a mixture of juce
Oh, btw, UPS might come by. Drunk me ordered us $75 worth of gummy airhead starburst type candies. Whatever it is, it'll be delicious.
I'm asking you this because you're my dad....is coke a drug I should try?
i dunno, a lot of my childhood feels like a drugged up fever dream
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score onr for mom.
Why is the microwave staring at me?!
Randomize
