Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
hitting rock bottom=girl fakes converting to christianity in order to get out of having sex with you.
i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
we just toasted to your mouth on alex's balls at the bar
I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all.
Just had such a rough shit, don't stop believin had to be played
I mean how do you tell a nurse in the ER that you dislocated your knee giving a blowjob to your boyfriend.
Very innocently.
He doesn't have any game.. I mean, his one move is forwarding chicks pictures of his penis.
So this is what you do on your hungover days off put your balls into an egg carton?
Seriously, even though I keep it clean, I could douse it in bleach and set it on fire and still not be comfortable with you actually holding it. It's been in my VAGINA.
You know I love you. I just don't love your penis.
What part of don't open in front of your kids didn't you understand? Astroglide, magnums, fuzzy handcuffs and a blindfold are going to be hard to explain as friends presents.
if you and your penis don't hurry up, I'm getting drunk without you.
She is either doing really drawn out crunches or trying to sniff her boobs...She's lying on her back with her hand behind her head, forcing her head into the cleavage that's ok to expose and then moves her head back and then does it again.
I don't know which is weirder: that she was old enough to have a live-in son close to my age, or that the woman he was with was close to hers
Randomize
