I puked in a mailbox on the way back from your house.
I drank it, and now my boss keeps hitting me in the face with beams of light.
Tripping at your desk probably isn't the best plan you've had.
So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
got some bad news about ur virginity. she didnt make it thru the night
The remote chance that I may get a blowjob is about the only reason I have a shower every day.
Tried to eat a sandwich this morning. Couldn't. My jaw is locked up. These marathon blow jobs are killing me
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
The mystery gender stripper never showed up with that party burrito last night.
At least you got some premium homework time. Still drinking vodka from a coffee cup?
I switched to water. When the numbers get blurry you are no longer being productive.
I'm now having weird sexual fantasies about that riverdancing figure skater. So thanks for that.
I'm glad your nude photos turned out "classy" but you cannot hang them in the living room.
sorry I called you to cry about the state of the neopets economy
You're up at 3AM, right? I have a very important question.
You know the Wendy's on route 6, by Kohls? Do you know if it has a drive through?
Yes it does.
my mom tells me this morning that i was blasting teach me how to dougie at 2 am last night and refused to leave her room until she dougied with me
My Mormon mother just found a butt-plug in our AirBnB closet.
Randomize
