Ahhh... Adderall running out my nose in the shower really brings back memories.
Don't leave without me in the morning. I keep scaring everyone cause I'm sleeping in the bathtub.
I know. I just don't want anything else. I have no other desire. Just a ham sandwich.
I honestly don't know what to make of that.
A ham sandwich would be nice.
Do you remember using the heel of your shoe as a shish kabob stick? You offered me some chicken, but I declined.
For the record, chili cheese fritos are not a chaser.
I think I just inadvertently started a sex competition with my roommate and her boyfriend.
I have discovered that there is nothing that a giant penis attached to a southern accent can't talk me into. yee-haw!
I know. I know. The man who pulled me from my mother's womb was the same man who had his fingers in my vagina today. My life is a joke. I don't know how to feel about this.
Now that makes it sound like you had sex with a guy in batman costume and you never took the mask off so you can't 100 percent be sure.
So I wore a corset to school. Fuck laundry.
I just woke up in my locked bathroom. It's 5 PM. What happened?
When I wake up, please remind me why my shoe is in the toilet, my shower is filled with jello, and there is a naked girl sleeping on my coffee table holding a bag of Cheetos. that is all.
Due to this morning's events my new porn name is Reepa Nipplov.
well theres no bloody mary mix at the campus bookstore so i dont even know what its good for
I guess it's too forward to greet him with a blow job?
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