I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
I wasn't on board with that statement until "home made dinosaurs"
Dude I still wanna know who I had sex with on new years eve
You then began crawling around in the grass with a magnifying class saying you were searching for the magic school bus.
Ya I guess he's not a bad roommate. I mean if he wasn't here I would probably be more lazy and pee in bottles and stuff.
Just ran into that guy that tried to take a dump in your pool
The background of my phone is you taped to the wall wearing a cowboy hat
I went commando last night, then accidentally flashed a police van...They acknowledged it.
He only likes me when I'm naked and I don't like being around him clothed. It's the perfect relationship.
That's the last time I get in a car with six rappers headed to god knows where.
Is it possible to break your brain with drugs?
Well get back to your date and give him the ceremonial 1am handy and text me when your done.
you were so drunk that when the mouse on your laptop didnt work anymore you decided to just take it into the bathroom and pee on it while laughing like a mad scientist.
He sent me a pic of his coffee mug to be like "I'm having coffee too.” \nImagine that. Morning coffee. In your boring ass mug. Dick pic or gtfo.
Because, after all, nothing quite says life in 2020 than doing laundry at 9:40 on a Friday morning to make sure you have masks and underwear.
Randomize
