I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
i just watched a video of two girls fucking with a banana and i thought of you.
i hate you
I told her at least we still had each other. That's when she started crying.
Do you ever go through someone elses pictures and just appreciate the fact that youre not really friends with them?
maybe it wasnt such a good idea to pregame our lease signing...
I just wanted to hook up with a white guy to prove that i could go back.
I'm drinking with 3 chicks and 1 gay dude. 100% chance I'm getting laid and 75% chance I'll enjoy it.
Was it you who made out with a toothless guy last night?
It's hard to judge what a reasonable amount of cereal looks like in the spaghetti pot. We're out of cap'n crunch and milk.
Denial and avoidance are my survival strategies for 2013.
Denial, avoidance and beer.
Hot dogs and hydrocodine is NOT the combo of champions
Come to my pity party. It's being hosted in my basement. The theme is ambiguously sexual cuddling and wine.
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
He a gives rim jobs, because, of course a guy who opens doors and makes reservations would lick your anus..like a gentleman.
Fucking hate kids. In particular I hate our kids.
Randomize
