Answer the phone when I call you in a second. Just got pulled over for getting road head, going to secretly put you on speaker phone, this should be good
BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
I have discovered something important. The trick to making food taste better is not always 'more hot sauce'.
just threw up into the cup of Gatorade I was hoping would settle my stomach. thanks again, alcohol.
It's surprise blowjob week. You should be excited.
Oh thank the gods of upholstery, i thought that was never coming out...
These pissing matches have to stop. They led to last night's scotch through the nose shots. I'll never smell again.
I'm assuming the reason my elbow is so sore has something to do with all the broken shot glasses eh?
Yep
Of course I will... FYI I just gave my balls a crew cut.
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
alcohol and riverdancing are a dangerous mix. have a spraind ankle. i die now
It's five in the morning. wtf?
Yeah but you let me touch your butt. You're clearly the winner.
He yelled "CARLI LLOYD" and then kicked the cake off the table. Soccer is making monsters out of us.
if jesus wore shoes made out of pure flavor and hurricane kicked u in the face thats how it feels to eat pizza bites right now
What are you bringing to class tomorrow?
sorrow
Randomize
