She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
I just saw a van full of amish parents and their kids. Those cheating mother fuckers!
It was huge And he was twirling it around. Im telling you, beautiful wonderpenis
I don't think the car's salesman understands that I am about to vomit on him.
He threw up in the campfire, the alcohol in his puke caught on fire. Im marrying this man
screw it, I'll just be a stripper until next August when then are looking for suitable teachers to teach the future of America. it's like a feel good movie just a little out of order and im a dude.
We need to get her a baby shower present. And no, a blow up sex doll with her dead boyfriends picture stuck to it, is not appropriate.
He asked me to spit in his mouth. I did. Never let me hook up with this guy again.
Your roommate from freshman year just had a baby. I think you're winning. Hooray for fifth year seniors!
also dude totally apologize for the whole drunken "want something in my mouth" text
My concierge just asked me to his place for dinner while I was signing for a delivery. The delivery was a box of vibrators. Let's discuss.
He told me to prepare for his "Jurassic cock" and I had to leave the room from laughing.
Go to the bar. Find a girl. Ask if she can cook. Tell her you have a guitar at home. Ask her if she wants to see it. Bring her home. Sleep with her. Tell her it's your birthday in the morning. Enjoy your made with lust breakfast.
I hooked up with a blind guy last night... he's clapping in order to find his way around our apartment
How'd things go with that guy last night?
He threw up in the consol in my car then started crying about his ex girlfriend.
Randomize
