she asked me if i wanted her to take her wedding ring off while she was giving me a handjob.
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
Ok, but If I make this happen, my first born son gets to fuck your first born daughter
Somehow she slept thru the vacuuming, people walking in and out, and the sound of constant beer bottles hitting the trash, but when someone said weed in a regular volume of voice she startled awake.
What should I wear?
Uhhhhh...idk? it's a gay bar
I found something that says "i'm here to party, but not fuck guys."
Dude it was a mini horse. It obviously only eats mini things.
let's be real here, you have a beautiful vagina. this kid is a doctors son. that's a remedy for beautiful rich grandkids. he is just trying water his family tree, and make sure he doesn't end up in some piece of shit adult home. go for it.
The cougar has a calendar on her wall of when she can give topless handjobs again. I pity her husband.
You are going to come home to a suitcase in the fridge. Just go with it.
I don't remember coming in last night, but apparently I ate a piece of pizza because when I woke up I had pizza crust stuck to the back of my thighs.
Now I'm ashamed that I wore a bra
I need to wake up with a beard between my thighs more often, I'm a fucking saint.
I can't tell if my need for dick is more than my want to strangle him
I'm that daughter that had to send her mother "DON'T GET SHITFACED" & yes, in ALL CAPS.
so do you remember taking your shirt off and just standing in your bra at the bar or no?
Randomize
