everything is bigger in texas. Including my drinking problem.
just had amazing sex with a girl I got caught with in second grade playing doctor. her examination is finallllly over
it was just fiscally responsible to stop going to strip clubs where the strippers recognized me
Nothing says "I'm a sorority girl" like puking at 830 in the am, wearing my anti-hazing pin, and getting ready for a tea party.
if you really don't think our country's going to shit think of this. Exactly one year from now I will either be in law school or teaching young, impressionable kids, maybe even yours. Try to sleep after that.
This is like the time you took a picture of your knees and told him it was your tits, isn't it?
tell your freshman friends. will trade sexual favors for swipes. ive got dinner tomorrow open and lunch on wed
Just because you graduated a semester early, doesn't mean you can take a semester off of drinking. Sorry.
You pretty much isn't said it
Those words don't go together.
her mom went out of her way to book us a room with separate beds... her level of gay denial is in beast mode
What kind of paramedic is he, some dude is dying back there and he's trying to get laid
I dunno that I'd be trusting enough of junkyard tequila to drink it.
woke up to my little sister's best-friend's boyfriend in my bed, but how's your saturday going?
I think I got into an argument with my cat's former owner about what a BDSM relationship entails.
Drunk text the hot guy two doors down confessing my love for him.... He gave me a thank you card today.
Randomize
