Picture the opening band right now: euro, beer guts, one member in oversized hipster lumberjack apparel, the other in childsized american apparel and shorts. Singing in german.
I just woke up in the 4th floor lounge at 5:30AM with my ipod on to springsteen and a condom on
I watched the entire movie Forgetting Sarah Marshall before I realized it was in Spanish.
I just saw a man vacuming his front lawn. What is this world coming to?
She wanted to test if her costume allows her to still have sex in it. It does
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
dude, i woke up with a mini keg on my night stand. again. like wtf
were you high?
When?
Actually just blanket yes to that question
Topless dodge ball cldnt top that
I was chasing disarono with Bacardi and watching ice cube movies. It would have been an epic birthday if I wasn't by myself and actually had some decent friends.. Hint. Asshole.
He did 5 five hand stand push ups and took off his shirt for a barbarian flex. Some girl took off her shirt and threw it at him
I just masturbated in the tanning bed stoned. Best decision of my life
Jello shots and homoerotic movie scenes bingo?
This is my second month of college and all I've learned is how to get a guy to go down on me without asking out loud and not to chase everclear with Smirnoff ice.
Essential life skills
I woke up with a pillow, shampoo and a plant in my fridge. Eggs in the toilet, and I was wearing three pairs of girls underwear. What happened last night
Randomize