I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
If last night was a website it would be called poordecisions.com OR uncircumcisedspanishweiner.org
just threw up nine times in the shower.. solid night last night.
he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
Thinking about bringing a vibrator to the tanning bed...kill two birds with one stone right?
Then she yelled something like "YOU HAVE SO MANY FORKS!" before collapsing on the floor
Dude id rather jerk off w a fist full of bee's than deal with that girl that never stops talking.
I know how to say Yes, No, and Your Mother's Vagina. So almost fluent.
Girl, he can't tell you not to take a bump just because you work tomorrow. You're on a wedding diet, remember?
You shouldn't do laundry high cus pink.
Guess who just got out of a ticket because the cop liked her costume? THIS GIRL.
i have a raging boner for Saturday, day drinking is one of my top favorite things right next to alligator wrestling and blowing shit up
I made him watch the first 5 episodes of Game of Thrones before I decided to sleep with him.
Leaves on the ground. Coffee in one hand and your man in my other. Lovely fall morning.
If I don't get alcohol poisoning from tonight I don't think i ever will.
Randomize
