I will come over but only if I don't have to take my sunglasses off for it
Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
I just put a picture of what I imagine Rob's dick looks like on it on my vision board. thank you Oprah!
I woke up in my girlfriends bed with another guy laying next to me. wtf.
I just woke up to pictures of every angle of his dick I'll ever need to see.
thanks for leaving the note with the doctor's recommendations for my lip, they are dissolvable stitches right?
I've been ignoring his texts cause last night I put him in my phone as 'ignore for atleast a day' and I trust my drunk self.
hung over. covered in somebodies makeup. and ready to drink.
He and I are basically the same person, except he has a glorious penis and I have glorious breasts.
dude she got out of bed and definitely took a shit then checked her stomach out in the mirror and whispered "well that probably took off five pounds"
I just sugar scrubbed my vagina. If I don't get laid tonight, me and the universe are gonna have some problems.
HOW CAN YOU EXPECT ME TO KEEP YOUR SECRETS IF YOU KEEP ON TELLING ME THEM.
Is it rude to send him a, "happy birthday, I hope you finally get an STD" text?
the fact you finally accept your bi don't shock me but as your fuck buddy I expect you girls to go family style on me
Randomize
