I'm trashed wearing your mom's snuggie. She says hello.
i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
She even gives head with a lisp.
dont worry it didnt get any better. she locked herself in his room and was screaming at the top of her lungs "IM GUNA PEE ON YOUR BED"
Who is this?
You offered to lift up your dress at the bar so I could see your lower back tattoo
Um, I think that was a general offer to everyone. So...who IS this?
Its everclear night, yall need carbs in your body!
You gave me your shirt to use as a napkin every time I spilled beer on myself. Before we went to the bar.
Omg I'm puking right now and then sneezed four times in a row. You don't know pain til this happens to you.
So that prostitue I banged at Steve's bachelor party just texted and invited me to a BBQ at her parents. Never again doubt the power of the cock piercing.
Woke up this morning with fake blood all over my bed which is a positive considering last year it was all real blood
And on the first day of my adult job, I matched with one of my co workers on tinder...
He was publicly touching my boobs before I even knew he's a famous World Cup skier.... That's how hot he was
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
You know you're drunk when you have to be picked up out of a bathtub.
Randomize
