ive been sending my husband naked pics of my whole body from my phone..its a work phone. do you think our boss can see? if so, im either getting fired, or a raise.
he put his p in my v, then his p in my a, and then tried to put the p in my m? first, double dipping is rude. second, i'm glad he finished shortly after that, i'm afraid of where he'd try to stick it next. my ear?
My 3rd grade teacher, who was also my fav, thought i was in prison. That seriously upsets me.
guess who just trotted in eating her oats and wagging her penis
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
at least he left the skimmer on the side of the pool so i could fish out my thong in the morning
Holy mother of cocks. I was grind-with-my-boss drunk last night.
She just got out of the car and said "hold on purse.. It's going to be a bumpy ride"
In fairness it was pretty good sex, but I still wasn't expecting the mass cheering and applause he got on leaving my tent
Like fighting the continuous urge to sing Neil diamond "coming to America" kinda fucked up right now
Nothing is worse than post drunken playoff baseball loss sex
6 tequila shots, 3 kamikazes and 1 rumplemintz.. The next day I puked in my office trash can while doing payroll. I may have to dock my own pay for lack of class.
i would compare it to sliding down a velcro-covered fireman's pole naked. no more bearded men for me.
I have not brushed my hair. I'm wearing a yoga hoodie. I look like I slept in a gutter somewhere. Today is going to be a good day.
I've peed in two sinks in the past two weeks. No one should be able to say that.
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