Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
Do vagina's smell?
The men handing out bibles on the quad are blatantly skipping me... am i that obvious
you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
is there a reason why there is cup of piss in the fridge?
no
I feel wrong giving my mom a cash gift full of dirty stripper money.
definitely not taking the whole return culture shock so well...drinking a 100 proof rootbeer vodka float out of a german beer mass
If I had cancer, and got to make a wish, id make the organization force your dad to fuck me.
Also just throwing this out there I don't think anyone who brings another girl back to your bed to share with you can qualify as a frigid bitch
Also, I would just like to reiterate my apologies for tearing up in the grocery store.
Didn't want you to think it had been open season on my vagina since we broke up.
well i don't NEED my liver but it's nice to have one when you're trying to have a good time
I woke up on the green space outside our dorm cradling a watermelon and sucking my thumb. College is crazy man.
It seems that I didn’t convey clearly enough how well and truly fucked we are, Jack. Listen to me very closely: we are DEAD.
If I look at him, he starts sobbing. Please come get him; he's scaring the cats.
Randomize
