Do vagina's smell?
dude thats like the second time shes peed on the couch at a party. we cant invite her anymore
RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
A 40 year old man just put his hands on my thighs and said in these exact words "you're so beautiful and gorgeous and innocent. But life sucks and you'll probably turn into a whore."
MASS TEXT! MASS TEXT! Your sad horny friend has finally gotten it in and can go back to being normal once again. You're welcome.
I CAN CONTROL MY GERBIL WITH MY BREATH. HE FOLLOWS THE SMELL. PROBABLY WOULDNT BE AS EXCITING IF I WASNT HIGH OFF MY ASS, BUT STILL
One time she made a chronological chart for the guys she has given blow jobs to, I shit you not.
After your flask fell out of your leg brace and you told your RA that it was juice, you tried to unlock your dorm room but your key was attached to your bra so he ended up seeing your boobs
I'm just over here all sober hanging with two high people talking about how they're "free-spirited stallions."
You puked on yourself, then demanded to take shower. In which you kept saying "its raining"
Bring me that man meat
He does have a nice smile. I also like to think he has a nice penis, but that's just a prediction.
I'm in Florida in a retirement community the fuck am I supposed to do but watch tv and disgrace Jesus
No matter how long you've been away, there's nothing quite like pooping at your parents' house
don't take offense to this but at the strip club tonight I legit believed one girl was you. almost hopped on stage and freaked out at you. you're a beauty.
Randomize
