Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
you convinced me to pee myself because I was wearing dark jeans.
Just found the video that explains the neighborhood applause. Your landlord is awesome, and the clothes are on the roof
Remind me to never go to the bar with your Asian friends again. I need to be able to read or pronounce what I'm drinking.
I've discovered that regular handcuff keys, sadly, do not work on real police handcuffs.
He's afraid of heights. How do I know, you ask? Blowjob on his roof.
I believe you called it tequila and nipples. The proceeded to strike a pose.
Being invited to eat tater tots at 1:30am by a rly hot girl then actually only eating tater tots is a major let down. Tasty, but still a let down
He brought wine and beer. I'll put my pants on for wine and beer.
High water is the most godliest tasting water in the world.
some how during sex we caught an ENTIRE pillow on fire. A WHOLE PILLOW.
I thought you were dead but then you asked me if your tits looked good. They did.
Bruh. He just said the words "cyber sex"-is it 1999?
may or may not have snorted a line of tums... wtf.
So what if is hockey, you don’t turn down sex with a professional athlete. They work out all day and have amazing stamina. Your vagina will thank you!
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