Theyre still fighting about whether its called america or the united states.
Just used my cancer results to get a free lap dance. Great day just got better.
I woke up with $100 in my pocket and I was so excited until I found an atm receipt for a $500 withdrawal. Not as exciting.
We are not in the same countries and I heard about your hook up last night BEFORE you.
I may be Daddy's little princess, but doesn't mean I can't be the blowjob queen.
Finals are done.. I just wanna get drunk and pretend I'm a seahorse.
...i'd have to set their sheets on fire.
I don't know... But I do think this is probably the longest series of texts we've written discussing your cock. David was right, it is a brave new world. Also, slow day at work again?
I have to bobbypin his pubes for us to have sex. The other day he wanted me to braid them.
In conversation she brought up that she slept with Tucker Max on the UF football field
So I got hit in the face with a frying pan. So def wont be at work for first break if I'm there at all
As a gentleman, I asked her if she was sure and she just whispered "wreck me" in my ear. I took that as a green light.
That reminds me of the morning I woke up on the sidewalk covered in chicken wings
My mom just used the chap stick I used right after giving him a blow job. I am a horrible daughter :(
Newest quarantine problem - I’ve watched all of the porn. Like everything on the the internet, all the DVDs, mags, VR, leisure suit Larry all of it and I’m still horny af
Randomize
