I was totally willing to let her keep giving me blowjobs as long as she didn't think we were in a relationship.
i just found five singles in my underwear?! im suspicious but delighted none the less
oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
thanks for brining me home and putting me in my bed. the pillow fort your built around me is also appreciated.
we just finished making mockaritas... then we prayed
god you guys know how to party
worst. bachelorette party. ever.
I'm going on a nature/throwup walk. Don't lock me out of the apartment.
if they reproduce, their children will be the worst quarters players ever
We are gonna be 90 years old in wheelchairs at the nursing home sitting at computers poking each other and waiting for the other to die so we will have the last facebook poke.
Confirmed. Vegetarians give terrible head.
I may or may not be taking a bath listening to the Phantom of the Opera. This lovely moment brought to you by xanax.
I decided that Calgary can keep my underwear. They earned it.
And by pregame I mean drink heavily and watch Russian dash cam car crash vids
i want to shrink myself down to penis size, climb inside of her pussy and just live there for a few months.
If we're going to communicate going forward, you'll need to be versed in Gillian Anderson.
Started my new year off by being hospitalized with pneumonia. You?
Found out I'm pregnant.
I'll stick with pneumonia.
Randomize