She said her name was "party"
Boobs. All I remember is boobs.
Just saw a guy from Kansas and a guy from Nebraska arguing over who had less of an accent. God Bless the Midwest.
found the other keg... it's in the tree
I gave him a handjob while watching the presidential address. Needless to say, it was weird.
Haha so I huess that means he's a little over 7. I can use my throat as a ruler!!
One less school supply you need to buy!!
Look you found him on craigslist. You should be happy that he at least HAS a normal looking dick.
Please don't drown this weekend. It would be a shame to lose a dick like yours.
He managed to tell me he was blind in one eye and convince me to have sex with him in the same conversation. It's love.
I feel like the other woman.
You ARE the other woman.
That bitch ruined vodka saturday
I like that you're Jewish, because you can rail me on Christmas Eve and it won't be weird.
just got home to find my brothers naked on the floor covered in chocolate. i am now nervous about sleeping in the same room as them
Know your penis has been the topic of conversation over glasses of wine.
The amount of drugs I did this weekend make me concerned about my health but at the same time fascinated to see if I could do more
Randomize
