Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night
My grandma had to be escorted out by police.
Aside from the fact that there's a penis in my mouth, that's a pretty good picture of me
I might have been fine if i had magic teleportation powers and could have skipped the car ride between bar and home
It is officially Christmas time in Chicago. There's a drunk hobo on the CTA singing the first 2 lines of Frosty the Snowman over and over and over.
I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore.
Maybe I'm nitpicking, but that looked more like how one would jerk off an elephant than it did playing air guitar.
And now to play every stoner's favorite game: Where the Fuck Did We Park the Car?! Disneyland Edition!
oh my god you are days, if not hours away from a dick pic. This is the day the lord has made rejoice and be glad in it
The last thing I remember is talking to the firefighter next to me and he was giving me fruit.
I apologize that you just fell victim to my random thought of how to make a blow job come to life via emojis.
I just showed this kid my nipples to work my shift tmw
You don't know the capacity of my vagina
the cuervo was good, but I started with jello shots. and when i threw up a whole jello shot came out.
I often wonder if we’re introverted extroverts, but I don’t think so. I think we’re just easily tired scumbags
Randomize
